It's Complicated...

Updated: Sep 7

Dating is complicated. Relationships are more complicated. When you have two people trying to navigate through these complications, it takes commitment, trust, and compromise.


Honestly, for me, it's difficult to make it to the relationship stage. After dating for so long, and never finding 'the one' I've come to realize that relationships are an investment. I want to be sure I'm investing my time and energy in someone I know is worth that investment.


I talk to my sisters, girlfriends, and coworkers about their relationships often. Most of them seem to be unhappy in their relationships. I think to myself, 'what's the point?" I'm unhappy not being in a relationship, but there's that 40% chance that I could be unhappy in one. This is not an actual statistic, I'm just making a point.


This is not to discourage you from taking that dive into a relationship with that guy you've been dating for the past two months. Sink or swim!


So, how can we as women be sure if a man is worth the investment? Mark Manson writes about the law of "Fuck Yes or No"(please excuse the crude language. Ha!) He writes"The Law of “Fuck Yes or No” states that, in dating and relationships, both parties must be a “fuck yes” about each other. The Law of Fuck Yes or No applies to meeting and dating someone, sex, long-term relationships, hell, even friendships. If you meet someone and one or both of you aren’t a “fuck yes” for seeing each other again, that’s a “fuck no.” If you go on a first date and aren’t a “fuck yes” about a second date, that’s a “fuck no.”

It all comes down to this. If you're dating someone and you see all the red flags, but you continue to ignore them, then you're not making the right investment. Yes, you'll have a relationship status that proudly displays your "In a relationship", but you may become a part of the 40%.


Single ladies, in the world of dating and relationships, be sure you are making the right investment. Don't just be in a relationship to be in a relationship. Be in a relationship that is worth the investment. Being unhappy is not an investment. I know it's difficult, believe me! I only recognize 'Single Awareness Day' as a holiday. What's Valentine's Day, again? Just take your time with dating before committing to a relationship.


Remember, it's worth the wait. You're worth the investment.


With love,

XO

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